Why I started talking to spirit and why I encourage it for you, too!


(Approx read time 8 minutes)


A little while ago my cousin Suzy asked me “why do you want to talk to spirits?” I wasn’t totally prepared for the inquiry, but I am now!  Hey cuz, good question…




In May of 2015 I held the hands of a woman I barely knew named Kathy and I suddenly felt the presence of her husband who had died of a heart attack. This was the first time I had ever knowingly communicated with a spirit.  My logical mind chimed in, what is going on, surely I am making this up?!  


As part of my ThetaHealing training we were doing a practice exercise and deep in a meditative state I communicated to my workshop partner Kathy what I was seeing, even though I wasn’t aware of the full implications of what was coming out of my mouth.  Shivers crawled up my spine and tears high dived off my cheeks.  Although my eyes were closed most of the time, at one point I peeked and saw Kathy crying too. We held our sweaty hands tightly together over our laps.  I relayed the messages I received.  It wasn’t long before my skeptical mind settled, I just knew something was happening, this feels different.  


Without any knowledge that she even had a deceased husband, I told Kathy very directly, Angel is with you (unbeknownst to me Angelo was her husband’s name), Angel keeps showing me your bedroom, he is telling me and showing me that he sleeps with you, he sleeps with you every night (Angelo’s ashes are in Kathy’s bedroom). He is like a little boy, he sits in your lap and plays with your hair, he adores you (this was affirming because I later learned that another Medium Kathy previously told her the exact same thing. Angelo had come through as a child, sat in her lap and played with her hair). He tells me you dance. Don’t stop dancing. You were considering stopping? Don’t. He showed me that Kathy was doing salsa.  Turns out she was doing Zumba and apparently just that morning she told a friend that she might need to quit dancing because of her ankle injuries.


The wow-ness of the exchange became even more clear when Kathy said she always sees 3:33 and considers it a sign from her husband; during the reading she looked at her watch and what do you know – 3:33!  


We embraced for a warm hug after the exchange and a stunned Kathy said to me, You don’t even know my husband died and you don’t know his name, you don’t know anything, do you?


No! I exclaimed with the shock waves still echoing through me. An outsider wouldn’t have been able to tell who was more surprised and elated by what had transpired. 





After that first compelling spirit communication I had a kitchen sink full of mixed feelings: excited, befuddled, scared and skeptical. In the following weeks I sat with willing friends and did a few very successful, undeniably accurate readings trying to gain more clarity. What was clear was that I had access to this mysterious gift.  And yet, my thoughts and feelings sat in an un-composted mess.  One of the issues was that I was unclear about my “why” behind talking to spirit.  As an avid meditator with a strong connection to Source energy; I held myself up to an ideal, quite honestly thinking I was ‘too spiritual’ to be doing some Ouija board nonsense. What could our deceased loved ones offer us that we can’t offer ourselves? I wondered. With apprehension and so many questions looming unanswered I decided to shut down my connection to spirit until I was clear. Basically, I cut the telephone cord. 


Eight months later, I sat for five days in silence at Esalen and emerged on the other end of my retreat having gained what I had been seeking. I was finally fully open to accepting and receiving mediumship as a gift. I began to understand that mediumship is an offering, a powerful tool designed precisely to help lead us back to ourselves.  I’ll explain further in a minute, but first a very cool story!


At about that same time, as soon as I was open to doing this work, I asked the Universe for a teacher, if it’s meant to be one will appear, I reasoned. This is one of those too good to be true moments, and I swear on my life this actually happened… shortly after my “request” I found this note ON. THE. BATHROOM. FLOOR. at my fashion job in New York City.  

Thanks to this “note” (aka. GOD BOMB) I ended up studying under Lee Van Zyle, South African Medium for eighteen months.  Soon the best day of my week became Tuesday.  (Which is weird because Tuesday is normally a throwaway day, right? Who likes Tuesdays?) At yet, every Tuesday I was delighted, taking a bus to Rutherford, New Jersey to gather in candle light with other professional mediums. The hour and a half often sketchy bus ride to and from my home in Brooklyn after my long work day didn’t discourage me; I had developed an unexpected love affair with an ancient craft.  Talking to dead people on Tuesday nights made my high powered career in fashion look about as exciting as watching the red carpet on a security TV in the parking lot at the Oscars.  I felt like I was finally up close to some real enchantment… move over Louis Vuitton, Labradorite is the new “must have”! 





My focus with the thrilling craft of spirit communication is to home in on messages from deceased loved ones that inspire true healing. The intention behind a reading is to lead people to a place where they can open their heart and dispel pretense both in the session and in life. Communication with spirit provides support to easily attain authentic states of raw expansiveness. As I started to breakdown my own walls, I started to recognize this mode as a way to encourage a similar softening in others.


Most of us wander around this planet asleep and overwhelmed, and at the time I was living in both categories.  Sure there are pockets of respite but normally we live in a world full of distractions.  To name a few: Dramatic apocalyptic 24 hour news cycles, clickbait anxiety-inducing social media, binge- worthy TV shows, drugs, alcohol, Prescription drugs, addictive processed foods, competitive fitness routines, and the most culturally acceptable distraction: WORK! Then after the laundry and dishes, there is no time left to stop, drop in and be in the present moment.  Instead, most of us are in a loop of busy, sleep, busy, sleep.  So what’s up? What are we avoiding?


In a word: feelings.


We use distractions (i.e. anger over Trump, excitement over Instagram likes) in order to make some contact with feelings, but a key ingredient missing from those experiences is our own real, felt vulnerability.  Feelings without vulnerability do not bring us into the present moment. Feelings with vulnerability are like a direct line to Source energy.



The word vulnerable by definition means “susceptible to physical or emotional attack or harm” so it’s understandable that many avoid this exposure, but what if we reevaluate our knee jerk reaction to steer clear of pain?  


While it is a common practice to want to bypass feelings, we can also choose to reframe the purpose of them, we do this by consciously saying no to distractions and instead embrace our tender feelings as the guide to true North.  Vulnerability, like fire, doesn’t just have the potential to destroy, it can also light our path forward.


Sure, I want people to understand that consciousness lives on, but I also want the living to remember themselves through a micro dose of experiential vulnerability.

A connection with spirit

is the reminder needed

to evoke the body’s

inherent proclivity to heal itself. 

When we open our hearts and

remember love, we heal.


It’s that simple.  And, that’s why I love doing this work.



One of my dear clients recently lost a friend.  In the wake of his loss, he was distraught and sad, telling me (and everyone else) “I love you.”  He told me that the death had actually strengthened most of his friendships.


It’s the sweet gift that the departed leave behind: perspective.


With death our perspective can change from out to in. With a loss we wake up, as if shaken out of a distracted zombie state and reconnect with our very personal, essential truths and core heart-centered values.  


Is another death or health crisis the only way to make contact with that sensitivity that we keep concealed within us all?  I don’t think so. In fact, I have seen clients open up to this, at a moments notice when we together engage spirit.


Would you like to put the smart device down and feel a real sense of aliveness? Okay, let’s call on spirit and make that happen!


With love,




Photo by Daniel Spase from Pexels


Leave a Comment

  • LoLo

    Beautiful and informative! So thankful that you’re embracing your gift and sharing your wisdom with the world…

  • Carolinne

    Lovely post! That note was such a sign . . . a guided soul! x